jaysprout

Member since 9/7/2007, last signed in awhile ago.

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Personal statement: I will not kill myself today.

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Interested in: No particular genre

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Titanic

Great, great, great
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"I wish this hadn't been my first exposure to DiCaprio because this is his worst performance and every time I see him, he's still this dorky character. He and Winslet are the least parts of this movie, though. From the ship - which is a character in itself - to the minor characters who are crew and passengers that you end up caring so much about ... this movie is full of things to love. Billy Zane and his evil henchman might be the best parts about the film but it's hard to say because it is ... almost a masterpiece. " [More]

The Others

Who buys this crap?
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"There are so many writers in the world who make little or no money and yet someone was able to sell this piece of shit. Amazing. Nothing is more disheartening or frustrating than seeing the ending coming before the movie has barely begun. " [More]

The Illusionist

Pretty to look at, but unbearab ...
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"You won't care about the characters and you'll figure out the ending about five minutes into the movie. " [More]

The Painted Veil

Gripping and Doesn't Let Go: Li ...
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"The acting, the story, the beautiful scenery ... *sigh* ... it doesn't get much better than this. You may never see characters grow like this again. Your heart breaks for both of them, you root for both of them, despite their obvious imperfections that make you, many times, not like either of them very much. " [More]

Four Weddings and a Funeral

Thank You
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"It's been a long time so I can't remember much about this film. What I remember most fondly is it introduced me to Hugh Grant and that is more than enough. " [More]

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

An Unforgivable Curse
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"I hated this at the cinema. Many months later I rented it and gave it a second chance. I hated it even more. This book is several hundred pages long and, despite the title, only a small portion of it is about the Goblet of Fire/Tri-Wizard tournament. And yet, that's all you'll get out of this movie. It's like asking for a peach and getting only the pit. Asking for an apple and getting only the core. Asking for sex and getting handed a used condom instead. " [More]

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Please Make It Stop
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"I love the books - you need to know that before deciding whether to read my review or not. This movie doesn't completely suck like Goblet of Fire, but it has a lot to criticize.Yes, I'll say it - they took the longest (and best) book of the series and made it the shortest movie. That's really all you need to know.These idiots that make these movies have no grasp whatsover on what makes people love these stories! 99% of what makes the books great is left off screen. If you loved the book, just read it again. " [More]

Finding Neverland

Ecstacy Not Unlike the Greatest ...
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"This movie is so great in so many ways I could even overlook the fact that Kate Winslet was in it. It is one beautiful moment after another but in the end it is even more than the sum of its parts. " [More]

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

Saved the Series
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"I must say my hopes and expectations were so low after the second movie that maybe this movie isn't really as good as I think. Having said that, I saw it last night and was most impressed. With multiple double-crosses and alterior motives on the part of, well, everyone the entire movie is one big 170 minute Mexican standoff. I don't think it was just lowered expectations - I truly think this was a great movie. If you like pirates. And all of these great actors. And good storytelling. Normally, I'm not an action & adventure guy but I did enjoy the action sequences more than usual. Sadly, the comedy falls flat in most instances. What's interesting about this series is it started off so tongue in cheek. The harder it tried to be serious adventure and all too self-aware comedy it lost something. What's rather weird is I think you can watch the third movie in either Lord of the Rings or The Matrix without watching the first two films of either yet this one you ac ... " [More]

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

diarrhea of the script
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"As fun and interesting as some parts were, most of the time I kept thinking "Is this ever going to end?" " [More]

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

When Do We Get Glass Elevator?
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"It had been well over 20 years since I saw a movie this many times at the cinema at full price. I realize most kids probably wanted to be Charlie but I want(ed) to be Willy. It's impossible to say Depp or Wilder play the character better. Wilder's portrayal was certainly mischevious and mysterious but Depp's downright naughty - almost malevolent and sadistic in a way that borders on Hannibal Lecter ... another character we somehow root for. Like the original, this is a masterpiece. It is not a remake, however, so if whether you loved or hated the version with Gene Wilder, you still want to give this a try. This totally redeemed Tim Burton for that Planet of the Apes piece of shit. Last, but certainly not least, this is the latest in a recent streak of greatness for Christopher Lee. I hope that doesn't mean he's going to die soon. He's certainly a national treasure (yes, I'm claiming him for the USA). " [More]

Pleasantville

Overall, Pretentious and Ineffe ...
By jaysprout in Film & Video Are My Life
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"If I understood the movie correctly, you're Black & White until you have sex and then you start to get colorized. The more sex you have, the more colorful you become.Yes, of course, I realize what the movie was supposed to be trying to say but it was so over the top, hit you in the face with a hammer, and - ironically - just plain shallow ... I feel it fails to provoke thought or inspire in any way. There were a couple moments that were funny and you don't get much more clever than signs reading "no coloreds allowed" but those moments are overshadowed by juvenile writing. It could have been so much more than this. Of course, it could have been much, much worse ... it could have been the remake of The Stepford Wives. " [More]

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jaysprout

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