Coming Soon

New Movies 2/6 - CORALINE, PINK PANTHER 2, and I'M JUST NOT THAT INTO IT

2/2 -- It's Groundhog Day!

Well, the little bugger saw his shadow, so we're in for another six weeks of winter.

But he also smelled his own breath, so we're in for some good movies before spring!

Not surprisingly, the groundhog wouldn't just come out and say which movies are going to be good--but he did give some short, zen-like predictions. Check 'em out below.

1. Pink Panther 2 -- Watch the trailer. I think Steve Martin is one of the smartest and funniest comedians alive, but each of his new movies makes this a little harder to remember.

Don't get me wrong, Pink Panther (2006) is decent slapstick with a handful of especially funny moments. If the sequel is any better, it'll be worth the price of admission.

THE GROUNDHOG SAYS: "My dandruff is really quite edible." (That means the film may seem off-putting, but is actually pretty good.)

2. He's Just Not that Into You -- Watch the trailer. This looks less like a story than An Evening of Stars Getting Together and Not Getting Together. Have you seen the mash-up video Christian Bale Is Just Not That Into You?

THE GROUNDHOG SAYS: "I quench my thirst with my own drool." (That means he's attracted to Jennifer Connelly, and laments that, alas, they can never be together. If you wanna have fun or just feel close to Ms. Conelly, Recast DARK CITY.)

3. Fanboys -- Watch the trailer. This movie started a brawl between the badasses of Star Wars and Star Trek. Vote for your favorite characters to help them survive the brawl.

Fanboys has been hanging around since 2007, so I'm kind of wary. Nevertheless, it's full of good people (Jay Baruchel, Dan Fogler, and Kristin Bell in Princess Leia's golden bikini, yikes!)

THE GROUNDHOG SAYS: "These darn saddle sores just won't heal!" (He's tired of all the delays, and hopes the film lives up to his expectations. It also means, would I please hand him my lip balm so he can give some relief to his rump?)

4. Coraline -- Watch the trailer. I've read the book by Neil Gaiman and it's pretty good, sort of Alice In Wonderland meets The Nightmare Before Christmas. Hey, that's what the trailer looks like, too!

THE GROUNDHOG SAYS: "Does a Coal Monster poop diamonds?" (This must be some kind of stock phrase among groundhogs. Do any of you know what it means?)

5. Push -- Watch the trailer. The director of this thriller made Lucky Number Slevin, which was pretty good. On the other hand...

THE GROUNDHOG SAYS: "I have blood in my stool." (This is far too vulgar to translate, and he knows better. I kick him lightly in the saddlesores and he scurries back into his hole.)

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NEW TO DVD 2/3

There are a bunch of Friday the 13th special editions coming out, some on Blu-ray. I was thinking about seeing the new Friday the 13th next Friday, but then my appetite for slasher films was ruined by the horrid My Bloody Valentine 3-D.

1. Zack and Miri Make a Porno -- Watch the trailer. Since it stars those two delightful cats--Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks--I'm surprised it bombed so bad in the theater. I haven't seen this yet; any opinions on whether it deserves a look?

2. Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist -- Watch the trailer. Don't you just wanna pinch Michael Cera's cheeks?

3. Redbelt -- Watch the trailer. A good but flawed film from David Mamet about honor (and the lack thereof) among professional Tae Kwon Do competitors. I learned from this film that the only belt higher than blackbelt is redbelt...and if I'm not mistaken, there's only one Redbelt at a time.

4. Bottle Shock -- Watch the trailer. Starring Bill Pullman and the superb Alan Rickman, this comedy-drama's set in 1976, within the world of wine-making and wine-tasting. If you've ever been to a wine-tasting, you know there's plenty to make fun of there.

The best comments I've ever heard at a wine-tasting. I'm not making these up:

     (1) It's a bit austere in the mid-nose.

     (2) Ooh, I'm almost sensing a bit of effervescence that isn't really there!

5. The Secret Life of Bees -- Watch the trailer. Wow, that Dakota Fanning is everywhere these days.

Yesterday I saw Dakota down at the DMV, trying to get her driver's license. I'm like, "What do you need that for?" And she's like, "I'm not gonna drive! They're just photographing me! My agent made this deal so that my picture goes on every new photo ID in America."

Just an FYI, if you're going to get a license or passport.

6. Assault on Precint 13 (re-release) -- This is one John Carpenter classic I haven't seen. Any opinions of it?

7. Being There (re-release) -- Watch the trailer. I'm a fan of Peter Sellers, but I haven't seen this one. By the way, we're giving it away. Find out how to win.

Re:New Movies 2/6 - CORALINE, PINK PANTHER 2, and I'M JUST NOT THAT INTO IT

Not a bad line-up, especially during this traditional dumping ground season.  I'm most excited for Coraline, especially coming after Gaiman's Newberry win for Graveyard Book and Selick's consistently quality stop-motion animation.  Coraline is also the book that scared the tuna salad out of my wife and, 7 months later, she still won't go into the basement at night, especially when I offer to go with her.  Her spooked-out state has me even more intrigued about the film!

Lucky # Slevin was pretty cool, so we'll see about the director's follow-up.

Here's hoping the "Spring" films stay strong and veer away from the likes of Vantage Point, Smart People, and Stop-Loss.