B Movies

Your Star Vehicle

I was telling a friend how much fun I had with Talladega Nights and Semi-Pro, and she said "It seems like they're writing movies specifically for Will Ferrell."  I agree.  It's hard to imagine these movies existing without Ferrell.  Like imagining Kane without Welles.

So if someone wrote a vehicle for you, what would it be?

Mine would be a sword-and-sorcery epic that begins in this world but takes me to a mythological Dark Age of warriors and wizards.  I would become both a warrior and a wizard.  There would be a scene where I best an ogre that set up a toll booth on a bridge, and there would be a scene where I frighten a dragon, making it squeal like a little girly dragon.  

It would be called something like Axehand or Gauntlethand.

Re:Your Star Vehicle

SkyPilot:

So if someone wrote a vehicle for you, what would it be?

   Mine would be something like  Death Wish , about a down-on-his-luck, disgruntled, middle-aged man (I wouldn't even have to ACT) who finds himself in a situation where he gets to shoot and stab and maim and kill a bunch of 'bad guys'.   By the way, have any of you guys heard that Stallone is set to step into Charles Bronson's shoes and take over the  Death Wish  franchise?   I can only assume this means they are intending to remake the entire series...   I only have one question about this...   In the name of God, WHY? ...

Re:Your Star Vehicle

SkyPilot:

So if someone wrote a vehicle for you, what would it be?

One thing is for sure, it would be some hardcore metafilm.  And I mean the hardest core.  All the metafilm I've seen so far is way too wimpy for this boy.

Re:Your Star Vehicle

SkyPilot:

 

So if someone wrote a vehicle for you, what would it be?

In highschool, one of my friends used to tell me that he could see me being in a Wes Andersen film, long before I had any clue/cared who Wes Andersen is, or before I saw 'Bottle Rocket' or 'Rushmore'.

I think my charater would be somewhere between Michael Cera in 'Juno' (or any movie, for that matter) and Jason Schwartzmann in 'Rushmore'.  I'd be that somewhat awkward college kid, disillusioned with the world and with adult life.  I would have to have a best-friend-sidekick, probably a wise-cracking witty, but wise girl placed by Ellen Page and based a real friend who is remarkably like a college-aged 'Juno'. 

I'd also have to write in a few of my other friends that are always around when we seem to get in trouble and have the most fun... there'd be The Lost Boy, a 23 year-old highschool dropout/skater who will never grow up, a 22 year-old sandwhich delivery guy with a long hard past who masks it all with a really upbeat attitude and a perpetual state of intoxication, and my best guy friend, who is really fun, incredibly crazy but winds up moving away to do what he loves, which is what would spark me to think about my direction in life.

I'd be wandering through life as I finish up college, trying to figure out what I want to do, and having some crazy experiences and meeting tons of new people along the way.  I'd make a few mistakes, learn a few lessons, and grow through out the movie as I realized what I want to do and struggle to find my purpose in life.  Do I want to go to grad school and become an English teacher?  Or do I want to find a 'good' corporate job? 

Screenplay to follow ;-)