Not picking up the phone means you don't have to hear the bad news: you've got a lump in your breast. And that's exactly what Katie Sampson has — a tumour — along with a loving husband, a difficult father-in-law who survived Auschwitz (and will make sure you never forget it), a rebellious daughter, a teenage son who worships pot and older women, and a seven year-old who's obsessed with God and death.
D-Day: right after having a core biopsy performed on her right breast, Katie runs into an ailing reality TV show, broadcasting live from the hospital. Katie cracks joke after joke (under the circumstances, what else is she going to do?), and stuns the TV world. In fact, she's born for TV and ends up taking over the show.