It’s funny how out of control a rumor can spin on the web. The Angelina Jolie as Catwoman “news” has to be at the top of the list of most reported unconfirmed rumors ever. And it’s sad that it’s not actually true, because after seeing Jolie in the dominatrix outfit she wears at the beginning of Mr. and Mrs. Smith, I’d be perfectly fine seeing her wear another tight black costume for a possible third Christopher Nolan-directed Batman movie.
But who instead could play the part, if Jolie is indeed not interested, or not even offered the role (or, obviously, if Catwoman is not in the movie, as screenwriter David Goyer has apparently hinted)? One theory says that Maggie Gyllenhaal will return in the follow-up to The Dark Knight, this time donning a catsuit (Graeme at io9 strongly disputes the idea). Another terrible suggestion is to cast the too-cute Zooey Deschanel as the villainess. A far more interesting recommendation, from Catherine Bray, is Tilda Swinton. But I think the character needs to be a little sexier. Plus, I want to dismiss Bray’s idea on the principle that it’s included in the DenOfGeek list, which consists mostly of the usual hot young actress ideas that probably get thrown around for every casting decision like this.
I’m actually shocked that Eva Green wasn’t anyone’s pick, as she’s one of those hot young actresses, and she’s done the “good and bad at the same time” thing in Casino Royale. She was even part of my list until a better candidate edged her out, mostly on the idea that we don’t need to see her replay Vesper Lynd in a Catwoman costume. So, who did make the cut? Check out my 10 favorites, in descending order, after the jump:

10. Halle Berry - She is a good actress, and she was a great sport in accepting her Razzie for playing the character in Catwoman, so wouldn’t it be neat if Nolan gave her a second chance at the part? It certainly fits with the nine lives thing. Plus, with a better script, better direction and, most importantly, a better outfit, the Oscar winner would do a much better job.

9. Cate Blanchett - Another Bob Dylan vs. Bob Dylan showdown! (The Dark Knight’s Christian Bale and Heath Ledger each portrayed Dylan in I’m Not There, as did Blanchett). And Nolan can round out the villain casting with Ben Whishaw as Riddler, Richard Gere as the Penguin and Marcus Carl Franklin as Anarky (or he could be Robin?). Seriously, though, after Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I’m not sure we ever need to see her as another blockbuster villain. Besides, there’s other Oscar-caliber actresses who would be more enjoyable.

8. Penélope Cruz - Like this sexy Spanish lady, who I thought of for the role based on her line from Vanilla Sky, “I’ll see you in another life, when we are both cats.” Wait, would that mean Tom Cruise would have to appear as Catman? Hell, I’d deal with that if I got to see Cruz prance around with a tail attached to a form-fitting bodysuit.

7. Maggie Cheung - It’s been 12 years since Cheung wore a tight black catsuit for Assayas’ Irma Vep, but she’d still be damn hot as Catwoman. Unfortunately, she has retired from acting, last appearing in Wong Kar-Wai’s 2046 and Assayas’ Clean back in 2004.

6. Rachel Weisz - Something about her wonky eyes makes me think she’d be a good Catwoman. I can’t quite explain what I mean by that. She did a fine job as an attractive yet ultimately evil character in Neil LaBute’s The Shape of Things, so there’s another point for her.

5. Emily Blunt - A well-meaning bitch in The Devil Wears Prada, I’d love to see Blunt do more of the same, only in a catsuit. In a way, she’s like my fill-in for the excluded Eva Green, since I continually mix up their names, and Prada costar Anne Hathaway, who too many people think is as good a choice.

4. Emily Mortimer - Basically my choice for the obscure, indie-cred slot, since I don’t agree with the Deschanel suggestion. Plus, I can see her building off her short stint as the two-faced “Phoebe” on 30 Rock in order to play a terrific villainess.

3. Emily Watson - The last of three candidates named Emily, Watson has always been my favorite love interest for Christian Bale (she’s played opposite “Batman” in Metroland and Equilibrium). Third time’s the charm, I say.

2. Marion Cotillard - I know, I’m probably including too many Oscar nominees and winners in this list, but after Ledger’s performance as The Joker, the role of Catwoman requires talent along with beauty. Besides, Michelle Pfeiffer was nominated for two Academy Awards prior to playing the part in Batman Returns and Halle Berry won an Oscar before giving her Razzie-winning performance in Catowman. So, as the most recent recipient of the Best Actress trophy, the chameleon-like star of La Vie en Rose seems the most appropriate. Oh, and some guy already did a rendering of what she’d look like.

1. Sean Young - The part she always wanted. And what fun it would be for Catwoman to be an older woman. You know, as in a cougar. Which is a kind of cat. There have been crazier ideas — though maybe not crazier actresses. However, Young’s unstable personality should make for an unpredictable and unbeatable performance.
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