
JCVD opens wide this weekend, and it’s no secret that I wasn’t a huge fan of the movie. Still, the screening I attended in Toronto was thronged with college students, howling at every mention of Van Damme’s name, so it’s safe to say that the Muscles from Brussels still enjoys a lot of popularity. It’s just unfortunate that people think that translates to JCVD being a good film. It’s not. So to swing the scales in the other direction, here are five moments from Jean Claude Van Damme films that are a lot more fun than anything in JCVD.
Cutting a rug in Kickboxer
Not only can Van Damme get his jam on (and is he playing air guitar a little bit?), he also kicks ass against all comers, without even missing a beat. The best part of the scene is the guy who snatches a bottle off the bar and breaks it, only to have Van Damme roundhouse him to the face. That guy sure didn’t look that determined, almost as if he knew what was coming.
Inspiring the troops in Street Fighter
You probably wouldn’t have expected Raul Julia, Kylie Minogue, Ming Na-Wen and Jean Claude to share the screen, but they did in this 1994 adaptation of the popular arcade game Street Fighter. Jean Claude addresses the Allied Nation troops after finding out that General Bison is holding hostages and demanding $20 billion dollars. He even does exactly what he promises in this speech: he gets in his boat, and goes to kick Bison’s ass. Patton had nothing on this guy.
Fighting himself in Double Impact
What’s better than one Van Damme? Two Van Dammes! He plays his own twin brother in this 1991 movie where they’re both out for revenge on the people who killed their parents. Separated after their parents died when they were kids, Chad was given a cushy living while Alex had to turn to petty crime to survive. Strangely, they both end up learning advanced martial arts training. In the above scene they square off against each other (’bad’ Van Damme Alex even slaps a girl!), but they eventually team up and go after their parents’ murderers. Classic Van Damme.
Vs. Chong Li in the final fight in Bloodsport
One of his first (and arguably one of his best) movies, Bloodsport follows the supposedly true events of American Frank W. Dux (Van Damme) as he goes to Hong Kong and fights in the illegal and underground Kumite match — which is a bit like UFC on major steroids. He fights through three rounds to end up against the reigning champion, and even though his opponent fights dirty, Van Damme still triumphs in the end. It’s a Rocky-like moment for martial artists everywhere.
As ‘Gay Karate Man’ in Monaco Forever
One of Van Damme’s first speaking roles ever was as ‘Gay Karate Man’ (no kidding) in the 1984 French film Monaco Forever. He has a small part as a man tooling down the road in karate wear for some reason, who gets a little fresh with a tuxedoed hitchhiker. When the hitchhiker tries to teach him some manners, Van Damme kicks the air a few times until the guy runs off in fast-motion, Benny Hill-style. His “Okayyyy” line directly to the camera is priceless.
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