I wanted to go and watch a nice end of the world movie, 2012, only to realize that it was a continuation of the themes that have flooded out TV (but not only..) media in the past months. In a nutshell, 2012 teaches us:
- the world is going to end on the 21st of December of 2012. They devote a few minutes to explain why. Zero time to explain how come that the Maya knew about it way before us. Not important, I guess
- Obama is a good president that is trying to save the world. But with a twist! The African-American president, which is Obviously Obama since we are in 2009, dismisses the white aide to listen to the much more human and knowledgeable two African-American colleagues. This is just a beginning, and there is a big twist!
- Since Obama is such a big character to be supported by a single actor, it is intelligently spread across several characters, namely:
-- obviously, the president, from now on O1, that unlike the one in "the day after tomorrow" has a big heart and loves humankind. Unfortunately, he dies, but wait for the twist!
-- Obama has a 20 something years old supermodel daughter, which ends up flirting with the reincarnation of Obama (see below)
-- The main scientist of the movie, Chiwitel Ejiofor, also African-American, who saves the world with the help of his friend in India, despite the white-white house mean character. I will call this Obama2 The Revenge (O2-TR)
- O2-TR is deeply socialist. He does not want the "normal" people to perish in the disaster, and he publicly declares it on screen, but at the same time does not propose a viable alternative. This leaves the mean white guy carte blanche to build the arks that are supposed to save humankind. Where do they build these arks??!!
- YES! In China! I assume that they did a public race to various companies to find the best offer, and the Chinese were obviously the cheaper option.... I guess that the quality of the ark is not that important, right?
- Now, how do you build a bunch of hi-tech arks in a few years? You combine public and private money, I guess. People could buy a seat on the arc for 1B Euro (many of the seats were taken by O1 friends at Bank of America, but this is not in the movie, just a speculation). The message is that without all this private money nothing could have been done. This leaves out a bunch of normal people that cannot afford a 1B Euro, such as all the people in the movie theater with me, which stared to sweat hard and think how unfair is life, and that they should get a better paying job starting on Monday so they can afford the billion (actually, in dollars, it's 1.5, be sure you keep this in mind in when you negotiate you 3-year-long 401K).
- Anyway, in the apex scene of the movie, O2-TR gets on the stage and delivers what is the equivanet of the 2008 O1 speech in Berlin. O2-TR skillfully reliefs the movie audience by convincing the other world leaders, all of them in the ark(s), to let the normal people in... O2-TR saves the normal people!
- Now, as any good socialist scheme, it is not well thought off: O2-TR's plan causes a catastrophe which would have been surely resulted in the death of everybody in the ark, wouldn't the director of the movie save them out of pity. In the meantime, O2-TR gains some more screen time and popularity by doing some nonsensical, untimely, and completely inappropriate action on the screen (such as helping to rescue a dog, medicating people here and there), while the other big boys try to remedy to the O2-TR caused disaster. \
- Importantly, O2-TR did not buy a ticket. Despite O2-TR claimed that it was unfair that only people that can afford a ticket can get on the ark (wow... now, next time you go on a cruise, or buy a car, or even get a drink, you should think about people who cannot afford it...), he forgets to reply to the legitimate question of the evil white guy "why don't you give out your ticket"? O1's daughter, soon to be O2-TR finance (incest?), forgets to respond too.
- As an aside, O2-TR and O1's supermodel daughter did not pay for the ticket, but were willing to use other people's resources and give it away for free (wait, where did I hear this before?...)
- Also, they forget to assess how an ark that is supposed to hold X number of people for Y days can now support 2X...well, just details, I guess, cannibalism would have eventually solved this issue.
- Now, are you ready??? What is the only continent that is spared by God's fury and emerges from the water as the new promised land? AFRICA!!! Yes! All 1st world countries have been wiped away, and finally the 4th world countries will rule the world!
If this is not ridiculous enough, my prime minister Berlusconi (yes, I am Italian) refuses to go and save himself on the ark to stay and pray at the Vatican.
Come on!!!!