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Puhnner Blog

Watching Films so I don't have to.

Under discussion:

Taken  (2009)

Caution! Spoilers!!!

from David Rees' 'Get Your War On' site:

http://www.mnftiu.cc/2009/02/05/mnftiu-movie-review-taken/

It’s movie review time! Movies are the lifeblood of our culture. In these troubling economic times, we must support Hollywood more than ever. Throw all your books in the garbage and go to the movies TODAY.

Yesterday I saw “Taken,” starring Liam Neeson.

If you liked the Bourne movies — but thought they weren’t xenophobic enough, or sexist enough, or monotonous enough, or just plain ol’ shitty enough — you’ll love “Taken.”

Seriously? I couldn’t believe what a preposterous heap of turdly, rightwing discombobulation this thing was. Liam Neeson should chop off his own toe for starring in it. And also? His hair? Worst dye job I have ever seen. You can’t tell me that’s his natural color. Colors like that don’t even occur naturally in outer space. “Manic Panic in the house!”

Liam Neeson’s huffing and puffing around Paris, driving cars backwards and breaking into lairs and judo-chopping Albanians, trying to be Matt Damon — are you kidding me? Take your 9-foot-tall ass back to Shakespeare camp and leave action movies to the young people, you AARP-wannabe interloper. (Honestly, Liam Neeson could be 30 years old for all I know, but this movie has such a pathological “cranky old man” vibe — I thought maybe I was watching a John McCain fever dream — that you have to add 52 years to the age of anyone involved with it.)

read the whole thing...the review is worth it.

 

posted on Thursday, February 05, 2009 4:23 PM by Puhnner


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