I bought Ocean's Thirteen without having seen it first because I was gifted with the first two Ocean's movies for Christmas and felt it was a key time to complete the series. Since I bought it without watching it, there will be no test, or it automatically passes, anyway. I just have a thing about completing series, as loyal readers should know, unless the later entries are so abysmal, I know I would never watch them again (see Superman III and IV by way of example).
I like the Ocean's movies. They're like caramel corn or cotton candy. All style, no substance. Why does there always need to be substance? Sometimes, I just want to sit back and enjoy some eye candy. Hot men, hot gimmicks, slick plots. I don't care if the capers in the Ocean's movies are virtually impossible to pull off. I don't care if there's no artistic element beyond the surface entertainment value. People who expect something deep and meaningful out of every film they watch are going to be sorely disappointed by these movies.
That's not to say that Ocean's Thirteen wasn't a little on the disappointing side, because it was. It still has the same stylistic approach as its predecessors, but by now, the cotton candy's become a little hard and stale, and my teeth are starting to hurt. Also, the movie's a little boring, which an Ocean's movie should not, of all things, be.
Danny (George Clooney) and his compatriots, including Rusty (Brad Pitt), Linus (Matt Damon), Saul (Carl Reiner), Frank (Bernie Mac), Basher (Don Cheadle), and the others, get involved in another heist. Their target this time is Willy Banks (Al Pacino), who screwed Reuben (Elliott Gould) out of becoming a partner in his brand new, much hyped casino on the Vegas strip. Reuben, who was trying to go legitimate, loses everything in the process and suffers a heart attack. The boys vow revenge and plan for Willy to lose big when his casino opens. The trouble? They don't have the bankroll to make their heist happen, so they approach one-time nemesis Terry Benedict (Andy Garcia) for some capital. Benedict, however, hasn't forgotten old smarts, such as the triple-casino heist that set him back $158 million in the first film, so he commands Ocean's gang to steal Willy's five diamond awards, as Willy is ego-driven and looks for the fancy diamonds as the mark of his success. Also, Terry would like to see Willy fail, as his new casino is casting a shadow on his pool. So, the gang infiltrates "The Bank" casino with the usual consequences, though this time, they are driven by morality and the desire to see Reuben avenged.
The movie was ok, but like I said, it was kind of boring. The absence of the women, Julia Roberts as Tess and Catherine Zeta-Jones as Isabel, means there is no sexual tension, and that's part of what made the first two films so sexy. Ellen Barkin, playing Abby (Willy's assistant), didn't inject the movie with sexual tension because her "cougar" scene with Linus was played up as kind of a cringeworthy joke. Al Pacino, possibly completely miscast, was worthless this time around; he was clearly in it for the money and not much else. I mean, he played a royal jerk, but he's done that before and with much more feeling and conviction. The only excitement I saw in his usual blustery menace was when Terry confronts Willy about a new game Frank (in disguise) is trying to hook Willy up with, and that was only because I started flashing back to Godfather Part III.
Also, the tone was a little more serious. There weren't as many jokes to throw around, and there was nothing spectacularly different about the gadgetry in this movie than what was seen in the prior two.
The cardinal rules of sequels: more is better, and recycle as much as you can. This movie actually worked with less and relied heavily on that second rule but without success.
I think I like the second movie the best. Well, maybe the first. Well, I like both, but this one is definitely the worst of the three because the formula is tired. At least George is a handsome, handsome man, and the others are nice to look at too (though Casey Affleck is sort of goofy looking).
I rate this movie a full on 6 for being cute but mediocre, since we are into so much recycling. Like I said, I bought it already, and will probably watch it again because it completes the set, but the first two are far more entertaining. Ocean's Thirteen may be one Ocean's movie too many.