(after some small edits)
My
experiences with the Spout.com event at UICA deeply effected my reaction to the
film—allow me to put the event in context.
I
am not one who enjoys going to movies alone. I enjoy watching movies on
my couch alone, but the act of driving in my car and venturing out to go see a
movie is an experience I would rather share with someone. That being
said, this particular night my ‘entourage’ all seemed to be tied up doing other
less than movie viewing things. So, not wanting to waste a perfectly good
opportunity to meet new people and see just how much ‘chops’ this Spout.com has
I decided to brave it alone.
You
can find that somewhere else online. I do feel the need to express how
greatly I enjoyed this film—because like the film I’ve been through the deeply
emotional undertaking of losing a loved one. Not only that, but I too am
on a quest (of sorts) to find the answers to what makes relationships
successful.
What
I found in this movie, as an audience member, is my deep curiosity in knowing
more about the inter workings of the deceased’s mind. Perhaps this is a
type of voyeurism, but given my generations fascination with writing (and
reading) blogs (oh the irony!) my desire to pry (along with Doug) into the
thousands of pages of diary material seemed rather natural. I wonder if
it made some of the older members of the audience uncomfortable—but I doubt
very much anyone under the age of thirty took issue with this.
I also took joy in the ‘character’s’ ability to be real on camera. I
found Doug’s father’s constant desire to give away things not only humorous but
one of his qualities that, for me, made
him human. All of my grandparents did this especially my maternal
grandparents. I tend to believe that when a person reaches an age over
seventy he or she finds usefulness in giving away things for which they longer
have use. My maternal grandfather was always giving away fuel injection
cleaner and my maternal grandmother was always giving away clothing I didn’t
really want or need. Unlike Doug, I never said no to either because I
didn’t have the heart.
When my grandmother died, I asked a hundred thousand questions about her
life. She was never one to talk about her childhood to us
grandkids. She was very practical and her past was over and done with and
there was no sense in talking about it—very much like Doug’s father.
Only after she died did I learn about many family secrets—secrets about
relationships, secrets about growing up in The Depression, secrets that put an
entirely different spin on how I viewed relationships and life in general.—and now,
going forward, give new light and perspective to my life and how I should live
it.
What
51 Birch street reaffirmed for me is that these types of things happen in every
family—just because they’re seemingly bad secrets doesn’t mean that knowing
them is somehow in poor taste—having the opportunity to discuss them allows for
relationships among the still living to further build and allows for peace and
closure with those who are gone.
For
me, I understand my own family unit a little clearer. I understand a
great deal more of why I argue with my mom and why I get along so much better
with my dad. I understand why some of my past relationships failed, and
going forward, what I need to think about when entering into a new one.
I
found the experience of living through a similar experience as 51 Birch Street and
then watching similarities to my own life unfold on screen strangely
empowering. I highly recommend this
movie to anyone who has ever dealt with family (that’s everyone.)
On
a purely technical note—the numerous projector mishaps and film interruptions
did not bother met in the slightest—if anything they served to reaffirm that my
audience cohorts were feeling the same deep connection as I was—and they too
were unwilling to leave until the finale was reviled.
#
Re: 51 Birch Street
@ Tuesday, October 03, 2006 11:33 AM
Personally, I think any family secret worth keeping is
probably one that has effected me my whole life, like an unidentified chronic
illness. To me 51 Birch Street
dismantles the notion that keeping something secret is somehow protecting the
people you love. It was, in fact, after Doug learned the ugly truth, he found a
more intimate connection with his parents. Doug's advice to start recording
your family before they're gone has really stuck with me. However, when I
consider how prickly my family is with their secrets, I'll admit I'm
intimidated. [Remove
this Comment]
paul
#
Re: 51 Birch Street
@ Wednesday, October 04, 2006 12:00 AM
Thanks for sharing your reactions to my film, Pariba (is
that your name?). Your post, and Paul's comment, has made me realize that
the "family secrets" aspect of the film is maybe even more powerful
than I thought. [Remove
this Comment]
DougBlock