Every year I walk into a movie theater at least thirty times and the number of films viewed increases a lot if you include DVDs. Each time a new feature unspools, I am hoping to be swept away, emotionally engaged or otherwise exhilarated. If I'm lucky, one or two films a year will connect with me on such a deep level that I feel completely connected to the people who made it. These experiences are what keep the whole process in motion.
At first, I had been generally uninterested in seeing 'Dan in Real Life.' It's not Steve Carell's fault... or wait, maybe it is, since he chose to make 'Evan Almighty.' No, I'll forgive him that one since 'The 40 Year-Old Virgin' was so great. But what a stupid poster for 'Dan in Real Life' - Steve's head on pancakes. Huh? The trailer was not too inspiring, either. But eventually one factor changed the whole equation. Enter Peter Hedges.
Hedges is definitely not a household name. He has only one pervious directorial credit and just four other writing credits. But what a selection it is. Hedges' first film was an adaptation of his novel, 'What's Eating Gilbert Grape.' That film, starring Johnny Depp, was a revelation to me in 1993. The story was mildly quirky, but extremely heartfelt and I identified with the character of Gilbert Grape. A decade later, Hedges finally directed a film of his own, 'Pieces of April,' also a quirky yet heartfelt story of family with knockout performances. Both movies rank among my all-time favorites. So when I heard this was the man behind 'Dan in Real Life,' I knew I had to see it. It took a few weeks, but I finally made the time this past weekend.
The previously mentioned Steve Carell stars as Dan, a widower with three daughters. He gives advice to others through a local newspaper column, but he is himself struggling to be the best father he can as his daughters begin to assert their independence. The story takes Dan and the kids to Rhode Island for a family gathering. The next morning, Dan heads to a local bookstore to pick up a newspaper and ends up hitting it off with a customer named Marie (Juliette Binoche). Dan's elation about this happenstance is short lived when he discovers Marie is actually dating his brother, Mitch (Dane Cook). What exactly is Dan to do now?
There are some things about 'Dan in Real Life' that don't quite work. There are some story elements that feel a bit too "scripted," and some moments are played a bit too broadly and feel distanced from the rest of the film. On the other hand, I connected so deeply with this film that it really stirred up the emotions.
The theme that speaks to me so strongly here is the difficulty of balancing obligations with the hope of personal satisfaction. Like Gilbert Grape before him, Dan Burns is a man with deeply felt family obligations who becomes conflicted when his passions are stirred. Dan is a parent, Gilbert is a de facto father to his little brother. In Dan's case, the loss of his wife has made his job more of a burden. In Gilbert's case, the withdrawal of his mother from her role has created his burden. Both characters are cut off from the partner that should reciprocate and assist to make the burdens more bearable. Both characters struggle to be committed, focused providers. But the acceptance of responsibility cannot erase the yearning that everyone feels to have something of their own, a passion and desire beyond the normal routine. To be accepted and have your feelings validated by another.
In Dan's case, his obligations are further tested by having the object of his passion turn up as his brother's new girlfriend. I could personally sense that conflict - to acknowledge your deepest desires would hurt your dearest loved ones, so the feelings must remain hidden. As many of us know, however, that's easier said than done. Many scenes in 'Dan in Real Life' amp up the tension of this scenario, and they are presented more or less in a very casual, realistic tone. Hedges' characters are allowed to be as real as a movie can allow. Many scenes feel extremely natural and improvised, and this only makes the emotions stronger.
Another thing that often helps seal the deal on a film for me is song choice. 'Dan in Real Life' features some fine songs by Sondre Lerche, including one extremely pleasant surprise, a cover of Elvis Costello's "Human Hands." My jaw literally dropped when I realized which song was playing (honest, you should have been there). Another musical highlight in the film is when Dane Cook and Steve Carell perform the Pete Townshend classic "Let My Love Open the Door." The scene where this performance takes place is so pregnant with emotion, I'm getting misty eyed just thinking about it (Yeah, I'm a softie that way). The scene is all the better because the guys do the song in a natural warts-and-all kind of way, not some typical Hollywood pre-recorded and pitch corrected fake-out.
Peter Hedges work on 'Dan in Real Life' has maintained my confidence in his talents. I think it's a shame that this adorable film had to be marketed as more of a goofy comedy to attract audiences. As fans of TV's 'The Office' know, Carell is the king of awkward moments with the acting chops to back it up. What a joy it is to see such a likable performer as Carell making smart choices in film roles. I would love to see this team work together again.