Indie Blog

An incredible waste of TIME!!!

Indie — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 03:27:01 GMT

I have to admit that I was once taken in by M. Night. I loved watching the dead people, the crop circles, and even gave the amish village a chance. I now actually dislike M. Night after watching this film, and I am surprised anyone in Hollywood would fund or produce something directed by him again.

Shyamalan has become a one trick pony. For all of this movies desperate attempts to round out a character and all of its inexplicably spooky atmosphere, it's still about the twist. AND what a lame twist. (please excuse the use of an incomplete sentence. I may have went to M. Night's school of painfully awkward dialogue.)

The actors (and I do LOVE one- Zooey Dashcanel) are phoning it in. I don't think that they have a clue as to what is going on, or even what their next line is. They may have been completely sickened by what could only be described as complete black hole of futility while making this movie (and I use the term -movie- loosely here). Nothing they could have done would have improved the end product.

Bad Special effects bad acting bad dialouge and flimsy characters definitely impact the film, but none of those can equal the dismal lack of tension. When the Happening is not blundering it is completely boring, and definitely not happening.

-----and as a side note---- was there a reason this movie had an R rating?? I certainly couldn't find one. I have seen more adult themes on episodes of The Waltons.

_______________spoiler______________________________

Her guilty affair is a cup of coffee with some guy from work??? Its all very 7th Heaven.

Haunting

Indie — Wed, 02 May 2007 14:49:00 GMT

My favorite biopic explores the reality and un-reality of famed violinist Jacqueline Du pre'. The cheeky artistic twist of this movie seems to be Jackie and Hilarys supposedly supernatural connection, the execution of which is (as the title suggests) haunting and beautiful. Also watch out for the story and perspective as it is split in two. Once from Hilary (Jackie's long-suffering and less famous twin) and once again from Jackie's point of view.

I don't know if Jacqueline was given to psychic connections to people in real life, and honestly I don't care. It definitely added elements both thematic and supplied a thriving back light to the story.

In real life Jacqueline, virtuoso/genius, descends into the depths after contracting multiple sclorosis. Depressing, though true, and the disease is heartbreakingly portrayed on film. Scenic and brilliant, Hilary and Jackie is a solid watch; no matter how haunting you find the added elements of psychic phenomina to an other wise straight-forward biopic.

The Funniest Thing

Indie — Thu, 21 Dec 2006 21:39:00 GMT

I don't know if I've payed much attention to Daryl Hannah since she did Roxanne w/ Steve Martin. She was riding high on the 'Splash' wave back in the day, but has since been seen in a lot of ...well check out a movie called Hide and Seek once, you'll see. I had clearly crossed Daryl off the list.... until Kill Bill.

-disclaimer_I have to say that sometimes I am too easily amused, and also sometimes by not much of anything._ That being said, I am comfortable saying that the single most funny/smart thing I have EVER seen in film has got to be Daryl Hannah as Elle Driver walking down that long hall in the hospital, making her way to one miss Beatrix Kiddo.

Here is a hitman (or woman) disguised so perfectly in her little white skirt, white stockings and even a smart little white hat. The accessory that tips it completely over the edge- the little white Red Cross eyepatch. It is what every nurse with one eye is wearing this season. The sheer ridiculous audacity of it didn't even hit me right away; bear with me.

Did she have on a nurse's badge for authenticity or a dapper little clipboard to complete her disguise? Oh, no she had on her Red Cross eyepatch. That means she's a nurse; no one stop and question her. She has on a Red Cross eye patch; she must have gone to medschool. It has just got to be the funniest thing...

Argh!

Indie — Wed, 06 Dec 2006 21:27:00 GMT

May I be the first to say that, although The Money Pit is an interesting movie at times, it is not the least bit funny. Every time I have seen this film it has become an absolute anxiety-ridden experience.

Nobody really should ever have to go through what happens to Long or Hanks in this film (and can I say that the idea of them starring in a movie together is all that I find funny about this film). That movie makes me want to hunt down that scamming old lady, where ever she is vacationing, and toss a toaster into the pool. I hate it.

I realize that the situation portrayed is not happening or has never happened to me and for that reason I am supposed to take some kind of enjoyment out of watching. I realize that it is all in good humor and really just a movie. Everytime I see it, I still just get really pissed.

In my mind this movie compares with Pacific Heights and just absolutely tips my unfair quotiant in a film too darn high. I watch this movie and become my own version of Woody Allen, raving and pacing all over the place.

Deja Vu

Indie — Tue, 05 Dec 2006 15:55:00 GMT

Deceived is a dreary thriller in the day when washed out thrillers were a Hollywood standard- The 90's are all about the thriller. The movie never became popular. People argue that audiences did not want to see the gloriously mis-cast Hawn in something serious; it could be said that her character was too trusting too naive. Frankly I think she did a good job at suspending disbelief (acting dumb) until the plot demands, and no matter what anyone says, Hawn back in the day was exceedingly watchable. Leave it to Hollywood to let a variable like the lead actress take the blame for the entire picture tanking.

What I find odd though now, looking back on the movie Deceived is my unrelenting sense of deja vu which had me thinking that I may have seen this movie's plot in play before. That's when it hit me. Deceived is basically a variation (and consequently un-funny version) of Outrageous Fortune. A loved one dies, pretending to be someone he is not, is involved in something that is less than above-board involving something that could make him a lot of money. The loose ends must be tied up, like pesky spouses that become aware of their husband's extracurricular activities.

After making a heretofor unseen connection, it took exactly five seconds to realize that both of these movies may just be shake-down versions of Charade with the mildly comic engenue of the day, Audrey Hepburn.

Everyone knows that a problem exists in Hollywood of finding truely unique scripts; which is becoming more and more obvious everyday. But were these coincidences a product of unoriginality or more a function of the statement the studios behind these vehicles were trying to make? In other words, was Deceived a announcement of movie star ascension? Were they, in fact, saying Goldie Hawn IS this later generation's Audrey Hepburn? The finer points of that discussion could be argued for quite some time, but the question remains in my mind as comparisons between the two films were likely to have been drawn during pre-production.

The movie Decieved is still at least a decent watch, as long as you do not anticipate any kind of real thrills. Even a re-hashed movie starring such likeable characters like John Heard and the afformentioned actress, Hawn, takes on a kind of life after the film. The climax is engaging, though plots like the deceiving spouse may seem common these days in many people's lives onscreen and off.

True and Beautiful

Indie — Thu, 09 Nov 2006 15:08:00 GMT

When thinking of truely beautiful films in the context of modern day I always first visit this film in my head. There are many factors that instinctually lead me to this conclusion, not the least of which is of course that it is visually stunning.

There is something of an unrealized Michelangelo about this film that is once chaotic yet wonderfully whole. The best part of the experience for me is to watch the brush strokes literally being applied to the canvas of this film only to be wiped away. In and of itself this movie doesn't promise much, though it is quite apparent when watching the film that there is an unabashedly masterful hand guiding the brush.

Visuals aside there are many common thematic elements about love and the absense of one-ness with another. The mystery of first meeting and the air of familiarity between strangers is played out. At once I thought of kismet of deja-vu, and enjoyed the playfullness that the characters enjoyed onscreen. But as the saying goes, "all good things must come to an end." Though if you've watched the film, you'd note that the phrase says nothing about it happening again.

Yes the immortal enemy of love, dastardly knowledge comes into play in the form of a casette tape stating that the love-lorn couple had loved and lost the battle before. Ah, there's the feeling of getting in too deep...

I loved every moment of it. It is at once riveting and totally contrary to quite possibly every big budget movie made in the decade before its conception. It will be a lasting portrayal of a simple love made death-defying, but then again, as the movie illustrates, love may never be truely simple.

Classically Christmas

Indie — Tue, 10 Oct 2006 20:21:00 GMT

Rudolph and his friends the dentist elf and the numismatist extra-ordinaire Yukon Cornelius are tops around the holidays, and forget Ugly Betty there's not a better acceptance story out there. Popularized by the classic christmas song, or maybe vice-versa (its a regular chicken or the egg situation), I can't imagine christmas without hearing Burl Ives warbling Silver and Gold from the soundtrack. Just hearing that song makes me want to find out how to make egg-nog (and I hate that crap).

Who has not seen this movie? It is quite possibly the best made-for-tv movie of all time, yes better than Boy in the Plastic Bubble and waaaay better than any tv movie you are going to find on Lifetime. Joan Van Ark has yet to do a christmas movie that I want to watch again and again. It is a christmas classic without compare. I dare you to find another movie with a nomadic elf that plucks teeth from a gigantic snow-beast. Why can't everyday be like Christmas?

Repeat Viewing

Indie — Wed, 04 Oct 2006 19:04:00 GMT

This is one of the first movies that I have ever seen that's not only fine for repeat viewing, but demands it. There are a lot of in-jokes and back-of-action shennanigans, but that's not what I mean by a movie that demands repeat viewing. On paper I should have loved this movie the first time I saw it. It is silly, chaotic, spoof-rific, and I already liked almost all of the actors involved. When I watched Wet Hot American Summer for the first time though, I just didn't get it. I was stuck outside the bubble wondering how to classify what was going down on-screen.

That was mistake no. 1- in order to watch this film, one's mind must be suitably turned to the "off" position.

This movie would have been completely lost on me, if my roommate had not missed it the first time. Knowing what was going to go on, I sat back, turned it on and was not really prepared for anything. It was then that I saw the funny. The funny is not hidden in this movie, that's not what I mean. The funny is frightened away by any judgement of any sort.

The -in's and out's of this film are all still completely laugh worthy, and I guarantee that upon seeing it a second time, you'll find more to laugh about. This is one of my favorites now. I bought it and I could have it playing on a loop in the background all day. Its about a camp, its campy, its not Meatballs, its fun and mostly profanity free, its not the Parent Trap, its chaotic and its spoofy and its not Airplane. Please do yourself a favor, shut your mind down and watch.

Miss Begotten

Indie — Tue, 03 Oct 2006 14:52:00 GMT

This film to me marks the death of creativity, and makes a mockery out of its audience. Please excuse the spoilers but the imagery of this movie can only be related by a few content examples from the film. This soul-sucking homage to super-8 nonsense starts with mastabatory rape to a chorus of crickets and screaming, and after many minutes more of sights like log-raping, crotch smashing and crusifixtion, I was pleased to see that no one even bothered to explain what was happening and disheartened that no one took the blame for its conception. Even the back of the box description (which is the only narrative you'll recieve when watching this film) is filled with enough nebulous dialouge to make the journey unrelatable and mean absolutely nothing, lacking the balls to even define the myth it was deficating on.

I would suggest that you never watch this film. And if you still want to, I suggest waiting until there is audio commentary from the creators to back up some of the disgusting choices. Maybe the message is not about brutality and more that we as a human race have come to stand for and thereby mean absolutely nothing.

Strange note: If you decide to pick up this movie anyway; mute the movie and play the Schindler's List Soundtrack. Its kind of a Wizard of Oz/ Dark Side of the Moon relationship; plus that way you won't hear crickets and screaming for over an hour.

A Dark Cloud

Indie — Thu, 28 Sep 2006 15:15:00 GMT

I know this movie is supposed to be some sort of come-back film for Allen, about how comedy is nine parts tragedy and one part laughs, but I didn't laugh at one part. This is another example of a movie that is a superb idea and completely botched by execution. I am thinking that when one compares a story through humor against tragedy that one part should at least be uplifting; the combo was clumsy and at points really took me out of the experience.

I really liked the idea of this film and fully expected to be absorbed, but it came off completely cold to me. The characters were almost completely un-likable, and although sometimes I like that, this was not something done with bravura. The dischord between characters only served to distance me and by accident. This is not some planned homage to the tragicomic diety of entertainment; this is an experiment in abject boredom and heartlessness. There is a deeply cold core to this movie that cannot be expunged by a million inane Will Farrels and quite frankly, if a movie is going to depress me, I think there ought to be some deeper meaning involved. This is high concept at its worst. If you want the experience but not the depression this movie gives, I suggest watching the Baxter instead, and I didn't like that movie much either.