So this past Saturday I needed something to do, and with no new DVDs lying around I decided to see what was on On Demand. This cable service has many free movies that are over 10 years old, and I decided I was in the mood for a mindless action movie.
I hit the jackpot. Commando, starring Arnold fresh off the sucess of The Terminator and a young, innocent Alyssa Milano, is a pure action flick with a little family sentiment thrown in, but little else. If you want to see Arnold kill more than 80 baddies (that's almost one per minute!) without taking more than a scratch himself, you'll love the premise.
Schwarzenegger plays ex-marine John Matrix who wants nothing more than to retire in peace with is young daughter by his side. This dream is shattered when an ex-dictator of a Latin American country decides he needs Matrix to help him regain power by killing the current leader. To ensure Matrix's cooporation the baddies kidnap his daughter. John won't stand for it it of course, letting neither civilians, rent-a-cops, or real cops stand in his way.
Matrix then goes on a killing spree, loading up on assault rifles, grenades, even rocket launchers and killing or pounding anyone who gets in his way. For most of the movie this means most of his enemies are not actually bad guys, but cops and others that get in the way of his goal. After all, Matrix's thinking is that nobody can or will stop him from getting his daughter back, especially innocent bystanders.
The action is over the top and comical. It tries not to be but turns out to be more of a comedy than a straight action movie. Arnold delivers plenty of one-liners, and when he gets in trouble, his trusty sidekick Cindy (who he teams up with by chance) is there to rescue him with both her womanly touch and mad rocket launcher skills. (One of the best scenes is when she shoots the first rocket backwards). The evil dictator's army seems ridiculously large, yet never manages to hit our hero, but instead run by scores to their death.
I'm sure there's more I could complain about, but it all points to the same conclusion. The whole premise and execution is terrible, but it's so bad it starts to become good again. It was entertaining to watch, but this doesn't warrent a positive rating.
3/10