digitalconquest Blog

Under discussion:

The Northville Cemetery Massacre  (1976)

One of the bloodiest and most entertaining over the top biker flicks from the 70’s gets a great 30th Anniversary Edition release thanks to the folks at VCI. The story is familiar as a bad cop rapes a young townie and blames it on the bikers. Being this is a small bible thumping type of town; soon we have rednecks and bikers fighting it out via knives, guns, explosives and other deadly weapons. Blood flies and spurts with every wound and it is non-stop action up until the bitter end. Our bad seed cop gets the victim’s father and a local mercenary hit man involved, but the bikers also have their own arsenal (in the means of a Patton-like nut who could supply Libya with enough arms for an all out revolution). Listen for Nick Nolte’s voice (he was dubbed over for the role of Chris, the lead originally played by David Hyry). Despite some cheesy lines, non-actors and a horribly fake helicopter explosion, this is still one of the most enjoyable and a personal favorite of the genre. The print looks and sounds great, and being a director’s cut, I didn’t see too many differences from any other release, but it did seem slightly bloodier than I remember. No matter what however, Northville Cemetery Massacre is highly recommended.

Under discussion:

Ashura  (2005)

Demons disguised as people walk the streets enjoying the splendors of life and several humans as snacks. A band of Demon Warriors are in charge of slaying them, but when one of the best warriors, Izumo, accidentally kills what seems to be an innocent girl, the group disbands and retires. Years later, signs and revelations point to the rebirth of Ashura, Queen of the Demons, and no matter what Izumo wants, he’s forced out of retirement. Teaming up with a mysterious renegade female thief (well, not mysterious to the viewer anyway), they must put the clues together and fight the good fight. The action is swift, the cinematography and sets are extremely colorful and beautiful to look at, but the entire production feels and plays out like a video game meets the Asian version of Buffy The Vampire Slayer. The CGI is too cartoony with green neon blood dissipating in midair (less offensive for the kiddies I guess) and some of the plot twists are definite head scratchers feeling as if the characters are trying to level up to fight. It’s fun eye candy, but only worthy of a rental as long as you don’t expect anything deeper.

Under discussion:

Beauty Queen Butcher  (1991)

Picture Brian DePalma’s Carrie being shot on video by some amateur with the reject cast of Saved By The Bell, and that about best describes Beauty Queen Butcher. Overweight and clumsy Phyliss Loden is tricked into the local high school beauty pageant as a joke. She doesn’t understand why, but her only friend outside of her cat talks her into going through with it. When the beauty pageant coordinator (a guy in drag no less) gets wind of it, she talks the other contestants into tormenting her to get her to quit. When they kill her cat and comes in last place, she goes psycho and starts knocking off one beauty at a time working her way up the beauty queen ladder. Will she make it to the top? I wanted her to so the movie would be over. An okay slasher premise with horrible acting and production values, this almost bloodless film doesn’t have much to recommend it to genre fans. Obviously meant to be humorous, the jokes are there, but the laughs are not. Whether or not I could recommend some of the other titles by Camp Motion Pictures, I could say I enjoyed them on at least an entertaining level except for Splatter Farm and now this exercise in tedium. Don’t vote on this dud, there’s nothing to win here.