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  • The Return of Resident Evil Bugs Voyager

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    Under discussion:

    Bug  (2007)

    The Return  (2006)

    Now Voyager  Production Year

    Return  (2006)

    The Return  (2008)

    Time to play some catch-up

    I heard many bad things about Bug, but I think that's because it was marketed as a flesh-eating virus horror movie. It's really more of a psychological thriller. Based on a play, almost all of the action takes place in a hotel room. Director William Friedkin ("The Hunted") manages to keep the tension up, despite the lack of scenery change. Ashley Judd ("Come Early Morning") stars as a desperate and lonely woman who falls for a possibly crazy veteran (Michael Shannon, "Before the Devil Knows You're Dead"). He thinks there's a bug infestation in the hotel room. And the crazy spirals from there. Judd and Shannon really give themselves over to their roles. And the film might not have worked as well otherwise. I was caught up in this from minute one.

    Despite it's very cool poster and the lovely Sarah Michelle Gellar ("Suburban Girl"), The Return is a mess. The premise is good. Gellar has these visions of her past, but can't remember why. So she goes to revisit this old town and tries to sort things out. Only, as the audience, we're as confused as she is. And not in the I-can't-wait-to-see-how-this-turns-out suspenseful way, but in the should-I-really-care-about-this way. I liked the gray look of the film, and it did all make sense in the end. I just got bored along the way.

    Now, Voyager is one of those classic films I put off seeing for no real reason. I really, really liked it. Bette Davis ("Wicked Stepmother") is amazing. I want to be her. Davis stars as a middle-aged spinster who is cracking under the demands of her domineering mother. She goes to a sanitarium and then on a cruise where she discovers herself, and love. It's not all happy. But it's all good. See it now.

    Resident Evil:Extinction is just stomping a good idea into the ground. Milla Jovovich ("Ultraviolet") is back as Alice who has magical blood which will stop the zombie plague. There are a bunch of other dirty survivors running around the desert that America has become. And some crazy scientists, that creepy computer girl and some hologram business men. The whole movie felt like when you fall asleep in a film and then you wake up not knowing what is going on. Only, I never fell asleep. It just made no sense. Plus, Jovovich was wearing way more make-up than everyone else. What was that about? Just don't see it.

  • 30 Days of Gone Baby Gone

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    30 Days of Night  (2007)

    Gone Baby Gone  (2007)

    30 Days of Night spends plenty of time setting the scene. We get to feel how remote the town is, how cut-off from the rest of the world. There's an attempt at character development. The friend I saw it with thought it was slow paced. I thought it was awesome. The blood against the snow was very striking. There were jump scares and tension. The vampires freaked me out. I liked the camera work, it seemed sort of hand held, but not so I'm-going-to-be-sick-shaky. Josh Hartnett ("Resurrecting the Champ") is well suited for his role as the sheriff of this small town who suddenly has to deal with all manner of horrors. He's not a bad-ass. But he gets things done. Ben Foster ("3:10 to Yuma") turns in another excellent character this year as a wanna be vamp who does their dirty work. This movie also gave me nightmares. And that hasn't happened since 28 Days Later. Highly recommended.

    Gone Baby Gone is just further proof that the real actor in the family is Casey Affleck ("The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford"). Little Affleck gives an excellent performance as a private investigator hired to help search for a missing girl. Then the plot twists and turns. All sorts of weird characters show up, including Morgan Freeman ("Feast of Love")'s police chief and Ed Harris ("Touching Home")'s angry detective. And it's sad and wonderful. Big brother Ben Affleck ("Smokin' Aces") directs his first feature film and pulls it off pretty well. A few scenes were a little heavy handed (the part where little Affleck is putting it all together), but mostly well done. Please stay behind the camera Ben. Please.


  • Green Street Hooligans go Barefoot in the Park

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    Green Street Hooligans stars Elijah Wood ("Day Zero") as a guy kicked out of Harvard the month before his graduation for a crime he didn't commit. He goes to London and falls in with a firm of football fanatics, The Green Street Elite, and gets in touch with his inner rage. The movie is entertaining and I found the GSE leader, Pete (Charlie Hunnam, "Children of Men") particularly fascinating. Wood is good with his angst, I just had a hard time believing he could ever kick anyone's ass. The setting was also very interesting to me, as I have no prior knowledge of this underworld of "football hooliganism." Though I could see many of the plot points coming, I still enjoyed it.

    Barefoot in the Park is supposed to be this classic funny love story, but it was really sort of annoying. Based on the Neil Simon ("The Heartbreak Kid") play, he also did the screenplay, Jane Fonda ("Georgia Rule") and Robert Redford ("An Unfinished Life") star as a newly wed couple who have some troubles when they move into their first apartment. Fonda's hot, but really irksome as a "free spirit." Her mother, played by Mildred Natwick ("Dangerous Liaisons"),  was the most enjoyable cast member. I'd say this is worth watching on TV, but don't go out of your way. Simon has some better scripts. And I just didn't get much of the humor or the romance. Sorry. Maybe I'm just heartless.

  • It Runs Rabid in the Family

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    Rabid  (1977)

    It Runs in the Family was pretty lame to have so much talent attached to it. All the Douglas' and a Culkin, I mean, come on. A dysfunctional family has to learn to get along. You've seen it all before and done better.

    Rabid is just further proof that David Cronenberg ("Eastern Promises") is a genius. This is of his early still mostly horror days, but it's moody and creepy. There are zombie-like vampires and a piercing nipple. Some parts are very disgusting. Some parts are funny. But it does contain one of his running themes, how technology can turn man into a monster. Very interesting.

  • Monster Squad Passing

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    Winter Passing  (2004)

    The Monster Squad was one of my most favoritest movies when I was young. When the DVD was released, I had a fear of revisiting. What if it wasn't what I remembered? What if all my childhood dreams were crushed just like when I rewatched that Alice in Wonderland TV miniseries recently. I didn't think I could bear it.
    Luckily, The Monster Squad still rules. It has everything I could possibly want. Humor, monsters, children who have to save the world while their parents have no idea what is happening. The film is rated PG-13 which is mostly for language and some violence. Otherwise this would be a perfect family movie. Some of it is cheesy. But most of the effects hold up really well. Make-up almost always works better than CG. I recommend this to everyone, especially if you love monster movies.

    Winter Passing stars Zooey Deschanel ("Bride to Terabithia") as the estranged daughter of two great writers. She returns home to find some love letters that her father (Ed Harris, "Cleaner") wrote to her mother, who has recently passed away. She finds her father very changed and living with two strange roommates. The film is just about Deschanel trying to find herself and connect with her father. The story is fairly blah, but the characters are interesting, especially Will Ferrell ("Blades of Glory") as a Christian rocker.

  • Tideland Superfly

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    Superfly  (1972)

    Tideland  (2006)

    This will probably be a rant.

    The DVD of Tideland starts with an introduction by director Terry Gilliam ("The Brothers Grimm") where he tells us that many of us will not like the film and many of us will not understand it. And then he says that some will love it. Also, it seems that Gilliam has a small girl inside him. I don't know that that's really a surprise. But, by starting out with the negative, I got the feeling that he was saying that this was a mess of a film and his intro was just a ploy to stem criticism by implying that the audience who did not enjoy the film just wasn't smart enough to understand his vision. Well, f you, Mr. Gilliam. I don't want my films to come with an explanation or an apology. And I don't like my intelligence to be insulted before I even get a chance to delve into the movie.

    So the whole 122 minutes, I had the taint of this intro in my mind and I got angrier and angrier as this mess of a movie played out. The story, and I use the term loosely, follows a young girl with horrible parents who die and then she has to fend for herself. So she creates an imaginary world. This fantasy Gilliam develops for her is in no way original. It's a blatant rip-off of Alice in Wonderland with hints of every other famous kid's story, The Secret Garden,  Beatrix Potter,  The Wizard of Oz, to name a few. All the adults are horrible, over-acting and extremely messed up. The young girl, Jodelle Ferland ("Good Luck Chuck"), is forced to do a Southern accent as well as several other voices which she is just not capable of pulling off.

    On a side not, I'm sick of Southern characters being trashy and unbalanced.

    Then the little girl, and I'm not sure how old she's supposed to be, 10 at the oldest, starts seducing a retarded man. It's f-ed up and for no reason. There's no point. Nothing happens for what seems like hours at a time. And when an action does occur, it is ridiculously implausible.

    I hated this movie so much that Gilliam, who I usually have some affection for, is now on the bus. And it will take a whole lot of convincing from people I trust to even get me to approach one of his films in the future.

    I do give this film one point for some excellent visuals. But they are not worth putting yourself through the torture of the story line.

    Superfly is my second blaxploitation film. I liked it better than Sweet Sweetback, but it's still not my cup of tea. The main character is a cocaine dealer planning one big sale before he gets out of the business. The story is okay. The acting average. But the soundtrack is magnificent. Curtis Mayfield is amazing.

 


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