The Thirst (2006)
2006 – NR – 88 Min.
D: Jeremy Kasten
S: Matt Keeslar – Clare Kramer – Jeremy Sisto – Serena Scott Thomas – Adam Baldwin
Starz Home Entertainment / Anchor Bay DVD
Anamorphic widescreen / 5.1 Dolby Digital
Extras: Commentary – Deleted scenes – Photo Gallery
Kramer is Lisa, an ex-drug addict stripper with a terminal illness who manages to cheat death when a female vampire turns her because she likes the way Lisa dances. Keeslar is Maxx; the ex-drug addict boyfriend who meets up with his recently deceased love at a fetish club and is himself turned so that they can remain together. The vampire ‘family’ looks at the reunited couple as an experiment of sorts. Maxx responds to his new sanguinary cravings with the same obsessive recklessness that defined his previous addiction. Events quickly snowball out of control until Lisa and Maxx decide to seek help, a decision to which the original group is violently opposed. Much carnage ensues. Grimy, foul-mouthed movie meanders along reveling in its conceit while offering no sympathetic characters and attempts to make up for its shortcomings with an abundance of exaggerated splatter, nudity and sex. Inappropriate soundtrack consists of punk/goth/industrial/metal melange blaring obnoxiously while the kinetic flash cut editing style frustrates. The ridiculous ‘withdrawal’ scene shows the couple in their old apartment trying to kick the habit and ends with them eating their cats after sucking blood from a mattress doesn’t work. Brain Damage this ain’t. A friend commented that it was as if the filmmakers were trying to emulate Near Dark (FAIL!) with every bloodsucker acting the Bill Paxton part – this is certainly a valid observation. The running time is 88 minutes but it feels like 3 hours. Recommended only to the most indiscriminate splatter fiends.